On my com everyday with a bit of changes made to my com. -.- Antivirus apparently isnt working very well.. Ohwells, at least the "unability to access MSN" was a false alarm ah, just needed to update then can le!
Its frickin 5.12 now in the morning, and I cant frickin sleep, insomnia's getting worse and worse. Shit happens to me more and more each day too, some were just caused by my own worries (cannot help one leh.), others are more to misunderstandings ba? End of the day, everything's cool, but still left a bad taste in your mouth. Always sucks when you dont get to see the full picture of things ah.
Sometimes people tend to choose the hard way out of life. I seriously feel like an asshole sometimes for making you cry.. I know what I did will not be reversed by me because the feelings have long faded, leaving me only with yet another bad taste in my mouth for hurting someone that liked me so much.
During nights like this when no one's there to accompany me, I start to think about the things I lost, the things I've gained, and also the things I've attempted to gain but however failed miserably.. I start to think about the past, the present, and attempt to visualise my future.
I remember the times I spend with just Nicol and Seyen, the times I spend alone with Lovell and James at the bedok reservior, the times me and the "brothers 5" would just hang aroun at the voiddeck playing ice and water even when we're already 16 years old.. Things that might not seem that long ago if you really count by the years, but still, alot of things happen everyday, new memories does not replace the ones I have, but however it did make them seem like they happened ages ago. If i were to think even further, I would be back in the past when I was just a brat drawing neopet comics with Hidhir. Or even before that when I was just pretending to be an ultraman and hitting other kids really hard because "good guys always beat the bad guys."
I am happy with the life I have lead till now, I have met too many awesome people that if I listed them all down here, you guys might have to find some time finding your names. Rest assured friends, bros and sis, you guys each have played a major role in my life. And I wont ever forget you even if we might not spend much time together anymore as we did before.
Ah, since I'm so bored, I guess I'll just list down those people whom I havent hung out with in a LONG LONG TIME.
Hmm... Tan Ying Chuan! Yes you bimbo! You ah! So long never hang out with you le sia! Last time we can like sit down at playground or anywhere and just talk our lives away until one of us checks them timing, hais.. meet up soon and slack leh! I know your reasons for not joining us nowadays ah, I apologise on my friend's behalf. He's always that hot-blooded one. Crazy. But still, really hope to meet up and talk cock soon yo! Gotta catch up le really! First on the list leh! Honoured not?
Muzakir and Haidar! Sorry for not being able to hang out with you guys when you guys always ask me out, understandable if you guys do get a little pissed behind my back ah really. But still, do meet up one day and crap alright? =) I didnt add Haziq here because I see him all the time in school, I seriously miss your jokes and shit sia, you guys are one of the craziest fuckers I've seen in my life! I like you guys! Not scared to do those childish childish things one! =)) Just what I need for a little "childhood relief". ;) Lepak soon ah!
ok time check again. 5.37am. TMD I STILL CANNOT FUCKING SLEEP!!
Almost forgot about Choo Zhi Yong, this guy, is probably one of the few friends I had while I was in secondary 2, my taekwondo friend. I've never regretted joining Taekwondo for that period of time cos of you bro! Although I did not really find what I learnt useful, the company and time spent with you was still really super awesome! Miss those days where we would just ride bike all the way to the dont know what swimming pool and waste our lives away while we both skipped lessons, or when we both came in late and had to do punishements together, where did you get posted to? Ahh.. perhaps I'll ask you about it someday when I meet you again or on msn ba? ah deh ah, although I havent met you for perhaps close to a year le, you still bothered to ask me out of Halloween and Christmas that time, really sorry I couldnt make it man.
Hyder! Havent seen you in ages too, the last pathnership we did on Atheneus together although didnt last long cos of my "bossiness" i believe, was still a fun and enjoyable experience ah, you and I were definately not two peas in a pod. More like polar opposites. But we still managed to become great pals someway or another, probably cos of our common interest in bullshitting and drawing those neopets comics I guess? Hows Silat coming along? You still haven't shown me how much you've improved mann.. Meet up soon! Let me kick your ass k? And for christ's sake update your blog! I do read it from time to time you know punk?
Life's been really hectic and it's really times like this I realised that I have really been neglecting too many awesome pals already. What can I do? There's only 24 hours a day and one of me. But I promise you guys man! I will defiantely hang out with you when I have the time! You guys are fine on your own I'm sure, but a good "long time no see!" would definately be another good memory for us to think back when we're old someday yeah?
Oh yeah! Valerie Ngor Jia Ying!! TMD!! Although we did meet up quite recently but you had to go attend to your "other half" halfway through ah, although we didnt really spend much time alone together, I dont know why I suddenly miss you too, as in, the old you, one with the long hair and stuff yeah? I'm sorry I wasn't able to show much care for you when you were down and stuff because you already had someone to confide in. But really, I have always wanted to be there and lend you a listening ear! If only you didnt mind of cos. Dont brood too much on those relationship stuff ah! For me right, being in a relationship is to be happy de, if you're not happy, whats the point? Right? =)) Also remembered wanting to bring you to church and hopefully make your life a happier one, but I guess sometimes shit happens huh? LITTLE MISS SEET COME AND HAVE A HTHT WITH ME SOME DAY LEH! I STEADY BOM BI BI WONT MIND ONE REALLY! =DD Try my consultance~ I'm gooodddd~ ;) We've really changed alot throughout these years huhh..
Life just keeps getting better and better, even up till now, I am blessed with more and more steady people along the way, like Sean, Houman, Yongjie, Nicholas, Adam, Zul... blah blah blah blah blah.. I am a blessed boy! =DD
Blogging about things that are unrelated about you definately did make my mind get off that topic for a while, but apparently i guess sometimes it just comes all back when you're done huh? I really go speechless when I wanna talk about you, I dont know why. You know sometimes I worry about the smallest things you do? Like when you get abit sian I worried that you might find me irritating, when you get irritated at me poking you I am afraid that you might just burst out and scream at me? I am afraid when you tell me you'll be fine on your own home. I am afraid of you not doing well when you go for tests, I dont know how to help you when I hear you just bruised yourself or even when you are down with diarhhea(ah that one, I just disturb only, make things fun mah!). Disturbing you nowadays to me is just another way of me getting a hyped up response from you, I dont care i you find me childish or whatever, I just wanna hear your laughter and see your smile. As long as you're not REALLY angry with me inside, everything's cool. :)
Okay! Another timecheck, frickin 5.58 now. Botak just talked to me.. hmm..
ADP from the future here! Oh wow this is a pretty embarrassing post huh especially the last part? Me and Ying chuan are hanging out a lot more nowadays tho thanks to mahjong and poker hahaha.. still kinda miss Zhi Yong and Haidar they all.. Oh well! My exams are ending soon! Hopefully I'll have time for them then? Until next time! (ADP, 14/4/16)
